Posted by Joslynn on March 29, 2004, at 12:29:51
In reply to Re: Transference or legitimate annoyance? » Joslynn, posted by noa on March 29, 2004, at 11:21:52
Thanks.
It is kind of a tricky situation, because on the one hand, he will sometimes do something above and beyond the call of duty. For example, he will offer to see me at the last minute if I am in a crisis mode. He also has gone over time if I am the last patient and I am in a bad place. The whole fact that he has kept doing therapy with me, even though my meds are relatively stable, shows that he has some kind of interest in the therapeutic relationship, not just in writing out meds.
Yet he sometimes drops the ball on little things. It's kind of confusing for me.
I am going to wait a few days. See if he does remember to call back. Maybe he was on vacation when I made the first few calls and now he is all back-logged with returning calls. I remember him saying something about going away, but I thought he said it was just for a wknd. And if he was away the full week, then why did I get the voice mail saying his line was busy? He must have been there, just forgetting to call.
He could be thinking, "oh, I have plenty of openings in April and don't need to call Joslynn back in March, even though she has called three times. It will all work out". But I don't know it will all work out, even if he does.
I wouldn't want to just stop seeing him, because in many ways, he has been so good to me.
It's weird, he slips up on the little things, but in therapy, nothing is little.
Talke the Lifesaver incident. One time after session, I offered him a lifesaver and he smiled and said, "oh thank you, I'd love one."
Then, not even the next session buy maybe the sesson after that, I took out a lifesaver and offered him one again. He said "no thank you."
So of course in my head I was like, "how come he didn't want a lifesaver? He took one before. Does he think I will poison him? Did he think he crossed a boundary in accepting my lifesaver before? What's wrong with my lifesavers? They are minty and fresh! That does it, he doesn't love me, I just know it. Love me, love my Lifesavers."
(Now of course I am exagerrating my thoughts, but you get the idea.)
I want to sit tight and see if he calls. I really do not want to call again. I hope he remembers this time.
poster:Joslynn
thread:329413
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040327/msgs/329869.html