Posted by Lyrical13 on January 18, 2004, at 3:07:18
In reply to Re: update on sister is cutting » Lyrical13, posted by Bell_75 on January 18, 2004, at 0:18:30
> He spoke to me about the feelings I have that lead up to me cutting myself (mainly on my inner arm) then said we should replace the feeling of relief i get from cutting with something else thats just as painful but more safe.
> He told me that as a kid him and his brother's used to hold their arms in a bucket of ice and see who could hold it in there the longest (heh yeah I rolled my eyes at that one too).I've read about other people trying this with ice. I'll suggest it to my sis. Last time we talked about it, it had been 6 weeks since she had cut. WE looked at the posts to my first query together. She said reading the posts drove her crazy and the websites I learned about because she wanted to cut. So I talked to her about always having someone with her if she was going to look up info on it. I could see her getting very squirmy and like she was jonesin to cut as we were online and reading stuff.
We have an informal anti-suicide pact...I also have a mood disorder (probably BP2 though I've thought for 13 years it was GAD/depression) I like your idea about the contract for suicide/cutting. It would make me feel a little better and maybe it would help her too. I've already told her she can call me even if it's 3am. She called me on New Year's Day crying and we talked for a while. This is the first week in a long time that we haven't done sister night. I have been trying to call her but she has been busy (that's a good thing) I had a workshop on the night we usually get together and totally forgot to call her to let her know so I was worried she thougth I forgot about her. We've e-mailed back and forth a couple times and she seems to be OK. I so so so want her to get help. I'm hoping that if she does get back into counseling and gets her meds straight she'll start to be able to process some of the feelings she's stuffed down inside. I don't think she really even knows what she's feeling or why she's angry. And hopefully the counselor will suggest family therapy and they'll actually go and maybe get some help as well. One can only hope!
Thanks again.
Lyrical
> Also, he was worried about me being extremely suicidal so he printed up on the computer a contract between us that said something like this:
> "by signing this contract I,*insert name*, agree to not attempt suicide or harm myself before calling *therapist's name* or Lifeline.
> *space to sign then person's name underneath*"
> It took me a long time to sign this agreement/contract but eventually I did and he gave me his cell phone number. I agreed that I wouldnt do anything until I called him and I felt so much better after having agreed to this.
> After signing both of us felt relieved and like we had a better grasp on the situation.
> So maybe I thought you could pass on the ice idea to your sister and maybe even tell her you'll do it with her as moral support. It might even make you both have a much needed laugh.
> Also the idea of a contract isnt a bad one, you could write one up between you and her than no one else has to know about stating that she will call you or page etc when she feels these urges and not do anything (including cutting) until she has spoken to you. If you speak calmly but seriously while you talk about the contract then she will see you're not just joking around and that you wont accept her breaking the terms of the contract.
>
poster:Lyrical13
thread:301953
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040116/msgs/302223.html