Posted by liliths on December 15, 2006, at 14:36:47
In reply to Re: Oxytocin Spray for Panic Attacks » liliths, posted by Quintal on December 15, 2006, at 13:44:23
Hi Q
thank you... I'll babblemail you the letter. I'll wait until I get the letter from my pdoc before making final revisions but all the basics will stay so feel free to offer suggestions... or not. I'm just REALLY appreciative you're willing to read the damn thing :)
This is one of those experiences where I haven't had anyone beyond this board who could even remotely understand my experience.
I think I even lifted passages from posts you wrote in my letter LOL
my therapist has been increasingly unavailable since Hurricane Katrina and it looks like he's going to be cutting his practice way back as he becomes more involved in this new direction.
I think about all the things I 'could' be doing during this time and realize I'm basically killing myself... it feels more and more inevitable these days - I've really let myself deteriorate and it scares me.
I've been on my own during a time I really needed not to be.. left to my own devices, without even having an appointment as a reason to go out, my demons have become very strong
I realize that even if and when I get my license, I am so far removed from it now, I honestly won't have a clue how to function. PRN stole my life - or rather, I let the experience destroy me... but is it fair that I blame myself for reacting this way to something so horrific??
you see? I drive myself crazy with my incessant blather LOL
but it is hard not to blame myself for letting them get to me...I will say that I didn't notice any effect from yesterday's snort of the oxycontin. I do wonder how strong the solution is. I'll go use some right now... OUCH! it really burns sublingually. I think I may need to inhale it from my wrist or something. It tastes quite odd as well... though it doesn't mention fragrance being added to it, I'm suspecting there's definitely something in there besides alcohol, distilled water & oxytocin. (what the label claims)
do you know anyone using that particular brand? It actually appears to be the only one available on the web without a prescription. I totally doubt my pdoc would prescribe it though I may bring in some articles when I see him next ( Jan 3 ). He could surprise me but I don't think so. He's been so resistant to making changes even before this happened. Perhaps he's become more lethargic as a pdoc though there's certainly no one better in this area.
I'll probably wait until the beginning of the week when I have privacy to try the kratom. I will admit I am nervous LOL
But re: the oxy.. you probably should go ahead and try it. I'd be curious about your response.
I'll wear it tomorrow as I HAVE to show up somewhere for a couple of hours. I'll let you know if everyone is extraordinarily nice to me LOL
I'll go babblemail the letter
thanks again :)))namaste,
lilith> Hi Liliths,
>
> Yes, best swallow the Kratom capsules with a glass of water, preferably on an empty stomach to get the full effect.
>
> I'd be happy to read the letter. Maybe best to babblemail it than post in a public domain?
>
> I'm interested to hear what effect the oxytocin has on your nervous tension. I think only a small amount is supposed to be used at a time. It sounds like it would be good to have around for those nights when I can't sleep at all.
>
> Q
poster:liliths
thread:712379
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/alter/20061203/msgs/713968.html