Posted by muffled on December 3, 2010, at 10:26:05
In reply to Re: blocked, posted by Dinah on December 3, 2010, at 9:53:37
Sometimes the truth bites :(
But I want to know the truth.
I been bitten by truth, then gone and licked my wounds, thot bout it, and then if the 'truth' has come from a person I respect, I will give it serious thot, and then....hopefully change my ways.
This happened relatively recently here.
It was a little tough, but I moderated my style, cuz there was truth in what was said.
Us Canadians are so freakin polite....thats not always a good thing....
Here's something I read in a book "Myth of Sanity" by Martha Stout. Pg 213-215 there is lots, and this may not come across well cuz I ain't gonna type it ALL!!! LOL!(I tpye w/2 fingers only!)but here's the part "In many ways, close study of dissociative behaviour supports an old truth, that we cannot simulataneously protect ourseklves and experience life fully. These two desires preclude themselves proportionately. To the extent that we try and protect ourselves, we cannot truly live; and to the extentet we truly live, we cannot place our highest value on protecting ourselves."
Out of context it doesn't sound so good,but its something I have struggled with IRL and therapy.
We have been talking about it in our church. That noboddy *Talks*, its just fluff. We worry too much about antagonizing the other, or boring them, or being devalued etc etc etc.
I have found the best ways to get closer(as close as I get w/anyone anyways...) is by making repair when we DO have a problem. THAT is how trust is built.
So, I think that here, we don't have enuf trust and respect built up, cuz we all walking on eggshells.
And if we screw up, we blocked with no chance to make repair w/in a decent time frame.
A chance at healing, growth, increased closeness is gone.
The dynamics here are askew.
BUT, the people here are good people, and given a chance it could work.
In the past we had blow ups, but we worked thru them. The dust settled.
B-mail was often the culprit...
But anyways....
I think this place is over moderated.
We are strangled.
And ya, I could come back and help my fellow posters work thru stuff like Bob wants....
BUT...
the problem is, for me in the past, is then Bob comes flying in and starts to block and the chance to work things thru is stopped.
Or I remember one time there was a particularly nasty post, that a poster was unable to tear herself away from, and she was obsessively reading it and hurting herself, and Bob would NOT remove it, tho I absolutely debased and begged.
THESE are the issues I have.
Why I won't come back.
Bob just doesn't seem to 'hear' or heed. :(
Thats what it comes down to.
Not that Bob is evil, or omnipotent, etc.
Just he simply won't act in the best interests of any one poster alot of times. He just sees globally.
:(
I think at times globally is good, but the individual is also VERY important as well. We ALL matter, not just the group.
EACH INDIVIDUAL has HUGE value.
poster:muffled
thread:970998
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20101201/msgs/972305.html