Posted by TamaraJ on March 10, 2005, at 12:20:24
In reply to Re: Kara, my turn. How you are doing? » TamaraJ, posted by KaraS on March 10, 2005, at 1:44:42
> > > Hi,
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> Your dog is a good influence on you. Unfortunately my cats refuse to walk on a leash (and I have tried!).
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-- Cats are such wonderful pets, but sure have minds of their own :-) Regardless, they are nice company. When I lived downtown, I saw some people walking their cats on leashes (just around the front of the building they lived in). But, it must have been something they had been doing since they were little. My mom's cat now is an indoor cat and probably wouldn't know what to do with himself if was outside. He's developing these little idiocyncracies lately. My mom was telling me that he is now in the habit of taking his little toys (even an old fake poppy) downstairs and hiding them. We think it's because everytime my dog is at my mom's house she plays with his little cat toys. So, he is hiding everything now in case the dog comes over (pretty crafy eh?). My dog used to be quite fussy about walking in the rain. If it was raining, she wouldn't budge off the front step. I had to tug and tug until finally she caved in. But it was pitiful because every few steps she would stop and shake herself off. She's ok now, but for a while it was a real power struggle to get her out in the rain. I don't blame her really. We got caught in a wicked rain storm once when we were walking back from the river (and we had about another 1/2 hour walk before we got home). It was after that that she developed an aversion to walking in the rain. Poor little thing. Probably thinks she'll melt or something if she gets wet :-) She's a kook!
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> Another good thing about meditation is that it is a lot easier to do - not so many different instructions as in Lambrou's tapping book. I did more tapping last night. I didn't see any benefit from it then or now. I'm still not ready to give up on it but I think one might need more information or instruction than is possible in a book. Either that or it just doesn't work well for me.
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-- That's the thing about the tapping. It seems that you have to be so precise in your thinking about what you are trying to tap away. So, if you are off the mark (because of some repressed anxiety?) then you won't get the results you want. At least that is how I understood it from the woman who did my first two sessions. But, I wouldn't give up yet. You really have nothing to lose - except the anxiety - and it isn't all that time-consuming. Meditation, once you get the hang of it, is, I believe, something that can be very beneficial. Hey, have you done any more accupressure? That might be better than the tapping at this point. And, has your friend been over to give you another Reiki treatment? It would be interesting to see if you have another positive response to a second Reiki treatment.
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> I guess there are worse things to become addicted to besides exercise. I wish that would happen to me! Yoga is great exercise for flexibility and for the mind but it doesn't take the place of aerobic activity. Unfortunately there aren't enough hours in the day to do all of the things we want to do and to go to work as well.
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-- No, it doesn't take the place of aerobic exercise that's for sure. It's true there just aren't enough hours in the day to do everything. I am thinking about getting a bike for this spring/summer/fall. Cycling is good aerobic exercise, and I live right by a lot of bike trails along the river. It would also be handy to use to go get groceries and go shopping instead of waiting on buses all the time.
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> I still haven't had the orthostatic hypotension yet. I probably will if I increase my Doxepin dosage or start on Anafranil. I did start taking the chromium again. It may be helping. I'm not sure.
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-- That's great! I would imagine if you have been able to tolerate the Doxepin that you would likely be able to tolerate Anafranil as well. Speaking of Anafranil, I submitted to post on the meds board to Link to see how is doing on Anafranil. I think it's been over a week or so since he started. I'm interested to see how he is tolerating it. I ran out of chromium, so I haven't taken any for a few days. I notice a difference in how I feel when I wake up. I have to pick up some more on the weekend.
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> That's not wierd. It's very standard to be afraid of going to the place you've experienced a panic attack. I was so stressed a couple of weeks ago that I was becoming afraid of going out anywhere. I was much too stressed to drive as well. I understand completely. I bet that Klonopin or another benzo would help you over that hump. Once you start replacing the bad memories with good ones, you'll stop being afraid of those situations. The other thing you can do is mediation with visualizations. You visualize yourself in those situations and handling them well and the while you're calm from the meditation.
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-- That's the way I look at it. Once I replace bad memories with good ones, I will be ok. The problem I was having and trying to make the pdoc understand is that although I would put myself back into the situation where the panic occurred, I couldn't put it out of my mind no matter how much CBT I did. So, my weird reasoning is that if I use something like Klonopin for a month or so, it will be like a nice security blanket and I won't obsess over a "what if" situation. I am also nervous about work because I do have a tendency towards workaholism, and my fear is that I will get right back into my old habits again. Oh well, only time will tell. I just have to put the fears and the anxieties behind me and move forward.
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> I'd definitely have to get a new pdoc for the beta blocker. If I did go that route, then nort. or desipramine would be my first choices. It's amazing how different I felt when I tried those two before versus how I feel when I take doxepin.
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-- And who knows. If you decide to try Anafranil, it may turn out to be the right med for you and then you won't have to worry about a beta blocker. It would be a shame to have to change pdocs since you seem to really like the one you have now.
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> My mother is really different from most parents. I remember when I graduated from college, I really didn't want to go to the graduation ceremony. A lot of my friends felt the same way. I attended a huge school so the whole thing was so impersonal. I had no interest in going. My friends' parents all made them go because they wanted to see them graduate. My mother said, "Must I go to that? You know how I hate those things." She often takes a view that you wouldn't expect. One of her other strange traits is that she always thinks everyone is gay. She has her doubts about me as well. She cracks me up.
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-- My mom sounds like a hoot! My mom was always different than the other mom's as well. She was one of those mom's that never forced us to eat things we didn't like or made us sit at the table until we finished the food on our plates. And, as we got older, we started trying things on our own and eating things that at one point we wouldn't go near. There was a method to her madness I guess. I remember going to a friend's house for lunch one day when I was a kid. The mother gave me a glass of milk with my meal and I told her I don't drink milk because it makes me ill. She said all kids drink milk in that house, and if didn't drink my milk I wouldn't be welcome for lunch again. I packed myself up and left and never went back. Screw her! :-) Although I was shy, I still did my own thing even at a young age.
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> I once gave up coffee for a couple of years but that's it. 8 years is very impressive! How did you ever manage to get up and go to work all of those years without coffee in the morning? I've never drank as many as 12 cups a day. I just couldn't tolerate more than a couple of cups a day. It does help with mood and concentration though I would think it would become counterproductive when you drink too much of it. I just love the taste of it too.
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-- I must have been crazy to give it up! The first month was rough, but after that I didn't even notice a difference in my energy in the morning. I think I must have been in a vicious cycle of high adrenalin (I have spelled that wrong) for years - peaking and crashing - that once my system was given a break my natural energy stabilized. Who knows. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. But, now I think if I can drink coffee in moderation, then I will reap some benefits from it. I love the taste and the smell - Ahhhhhhh - especially the smell of coffee beans being ground. Even the smell can give me a boost of energy :-)
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> So did you take the 50 mg. of nort. last night? Still going well?
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-- I have taken 50mg two nights in a row now, and so far, so good. I am going to try taking it a little earlier in the evening though (like around 9 p.m. instead of around 10:30 p.m.). I find I sleep really well on it. The past two nights I didn't wake up even once in the night (which is unusual for me). But, this morning I slept in. So, I think I will try 8 or 9 p.m. tonight to see if it makes a difference.Take care,
Tamara
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poster:TamaraJ
thread:456548
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050305/msgs/469252.html