Posted by B2chica on May 28, 2004, at 14:54:31
In reply to Re: I did something very bad last night... » tootercat, posted by Wildflower on May 28, 2004, at 10:56:21
sorry, gotta add my 2c worth here.
Please Wildflower, don't beat yourself up about this, tootercat is exactly right.
Believe me when i say i understand dealing with an abusive ex. and I know all to well about accidentaly getting unwanted (one-sided)fires started again. But i can now say Even if you DID "reopen Pandora's Box" it's not too late to shut it. You only went out once.
Just remember, YOU decide if it's the last encounter or not. If you absolutely DO NOT want anything to do with him then don't make contact with him and if he calls or comes over (don't let him in!) Do tell him that going out was misleading and was a mistake. That you don't want to rekindle a relationship...(add own words here...)
Be succinct and to the point...DON"T apologize for ANYTHING (i'm sorry if i hurt your feelings...etc.) this leaves a Wide open space for him to start old verbal tricks. My ex was the MASTER at guilting me back...i still Hate him for that but i think it's cuz i Hate myself more for allowing it to happen.Remember we're here to offer support...turn that :-( back to :-)
JMHO
B2c.
poster:B2chica
thread:351440
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040525/msgs/351588.html