Posted by Ilene on April 23, 2004, at 11:38:42
In reply to Re: Thoughts vs. emotions » Ilene, posted by rainyday on April 23, 2004, at 8:26:14
> If I couldn't have removed myself physically to meditate and calm down, I would have had to leave altogether and the day would have been ruined. I let those panic modes consume me with guilt and shame. I have xanax to take but I feel like that is "giving in".
I've read that panic attacks are more or less physiological, so you really need to take medication to control them. Despite knowing that, I feel like taking Klonopin for my GAD is "giving in", too. I don't feel the same way about ADs, though.
Clearly if I was able to get out of the panic attack last Saturday, I should be able to eventually do it anywhere.
I think you're setting yourself up for failure by thinking that way. I find that "shoulds" lead to feelings of guilt and shame when I can't accomplish what I think I ought to.
At the moment, it does seem beyond my abilities. I have a particularly hard time dealing with it at work, where I have cried too many times to mention. My p-doc thinks that working is the best thing I can do for myself, but it can be so difficult. Especially when you're in the "good days and bad days" place - I don't know which I am having until a panic attack up and wallops me out of the blue.
>I think your p-doc is right. I think I would be a lot better off if I could work. I'm very lonely and feel bitter about getting a degree and then getting too sick to work.
poster:Ilene
thread:338644
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040422/msgs/339151.html