Posted by DeeJay on December 15, 2003, at 14:00:29
In reply to Re: Surreal » DeeJay, posted by Dog on December 15, 2003, at 9:45:55
I think I just didn't send my response...or something strange happened..who knows! You have a profound response that makes me wonder. I never would have thought of the birth order of things affecting a relationship. Hmmmm....and the age thing...I know I'm 24, a baby. But I feel like I'm 50 sometimes. I hate to be alone but I hate to be babied and smothered, and sometimes I feel that way. Since out postings, I have expressed this to him, and he agrees he can be that way sometimes....but can't help it. He loves me. And I love him. He's the best thing that has ever happened to me, the most healthy, I just get so overwhelmed with the idea of marriage sometimes. I have been in 2 weddings in the past 3 months, and neither one of them has made me want to get married like so many girls do.
I also think being raised by men my whole life has fuzzied my fantasy of marriage. It's not something I strove for. Instead, I wanted to be self-sufficient, fix my own car, do things on my own...but with someone next to me. I have that now, but still can't put my finger on what I'm doing. I really think my medication going on's and coming off's are affecting me and so does my beau. He's extremely patient, however, if I even so much as mention marriage, he's a drooler and would do it in a heartbeat, so I keep that at bay.
I can be a real headache to live with, so I have to give him credit. But the "i'm 24" thing sometimes rings in my head...but that shouldn't matter. I've had crap. I've loved crap...and ended up feeling like crap. Now I just have normal, don't want crap, but want to feel anything but crap, even though I still do.
Hmmm. Make sense?....
Sorry about the *ghost posts* I don't have a clue what's goin' on in my comp today..;p
Thanks for the book advice...I will check into them over a caramel apple cider at Starbucks...(corporate coffee, noooo!)
Cheers
Deej
poster:DeeJay
thread:288897
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031207/msgs/290083.html