Posted by shar on January 25, 2003, at 1:14:39
In reply to Re: Anger, Honesty, Me, You to Shar, posted by coral on January 24, 2003, at 15:49:30
Coral,
I've struggled with the anger issue, too. You know, they say depression is good old anger turned inward. While I don't agree with that 100% (because I think some depression is mainly chemical imbalance) I do think it can apply to people like me...having a sort of low grade chronic depression with bouts of serious stuff. My therapist said homicidal ideation is much better than suicidal ideation--and that's when the anger is directed outward. So, anger is powerful stuff, and can be good for survival.When I've dealt more intensively on anger in therapy, I always end up with a bunch of family of origin dreck. I have a hard time expressing anger while looking angry (I can do it calmly), and there is a ton of shame attached to it. In my family, "loss of control" (which would be showing anger) was much worse than taking action on one's own behalf. Tho' it was ok to get angry on behalf of someone else (like coming between a doctor and family member). If anger was "only" because the individual felt it, and there was no "good reason" for it, it was just a sign of weakness and selfishness. So, I learned to handle it the "right" way.
I can now fight with my therapist, and tell her I'm pissed at her without worrying too much that she'll call and tell me not to bother coming back. (A little humor in that, but pretty much true.)
Seems I recall you being the recipient of a fair amount of shelling (as in being on the battlefield) without it being predictable or based in reality.
Or, was that me?......8-)
Shar
> Dear Shar,
>
> Your post really has me thinking . . . . ruminations over anger. It's one of the issues that came out in therapy (that I don't acknowledge my own anger). You've given me a mental maze.
>
> xoxoxo
>
> Coral
poster:shar
thread:35331
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030120/msgs/35770.html