Posted by Krazy Kat on November 9, 2001, at 15:10:59
In reply to Re: How many times can you fall in love?, posted by paxvox on November 9, 2001, at 12:39:13
Pax:
Thanks for the input. I agree with most of what you say, except the last few sentences. This may be because I am not religious at this juncture of my life - I don't know.
A marriage has to work for both people, imo. If we went by the concept of "even if it means that YOU have to do most of the changing", then women would Really lose out. I say this because I believe it is more difficult for women to be "selfish" and retain their own identities.
Other forms of abuse, such as verbal and even sexual, can occur in a marriage. It seems naive to me to assume that all men would treat their wives as you do, or vice versa.
I am certainly in agreement re: the need for commitment, the need to work on a marriage rather than casually throwing it away. When we married, we both agreed that that was our intention.
But, please keep in mind, that we have been married for over 9 years, and many of those years have been bad. We must find a way to almost start anew, and to break these bad habits that keep popping up.
I certainly don't feel any Right to happiness. I don't think any depressive or manic depressive would fool themselves that it is that simple. But I do have a right to a respectful and loving marriage.
- K.
poster:Krazy Kat
thread:13529
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011105/msgs/13720.html