Posted by akc on November 8, 2001, at 19:00:51
In reply to Re: Cutting... Can anyone identify? Everyone...., posted by kid_A on November 8, 2001, at 14:50:05
kid_A,
It is funny how your post has come along at just this time. I haven't struggled with thoughts of cutting for several months -- since the end of February, beginning of March. But for some reason, this week has been hard -- with the old patterns of each day getting worse rearing its head. I know it is the stress of taking care of my mom -- though she is doing exceptionally well this trip. Her husband is being his usual arrogant self, and for whatever reason, that is bothering me more than usual. But, I just keep hanging on. I don't want to go there again. It is like sobriety for me. I have some time under my belt, and I want to keep building.
It is easy to romantize -- and I can just hear the wheels turning in some peoples' heads -- how could that be? While there may be some biochemical reasons behind why self-harm is so effective as a release, there is for me much more to it -- the act itself holds meaning. It is hard to put it to words -- I have never even tried. It is something I try to perfect when I do it -- it is something I can control -- how much, how deep, how often.
Anyway, your post comes at an interesting time. Thanks for posting it -- it takes courage to admit that you self-harm.
akc
poster:akc
thread:13645
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011105/msgs/13682.html