Posted by zenhussy on February 9, 2007, at 13:13:02
In reply to Re: How do you deal with feeling manipulated? » zenhussy, posted by one woman cine on February 9, 2007, at 8:50:58
>>>Yeah, feeling manipulated - it is a bear - your post makes perfect sense, thanks for saying it in such a cogent way.<<<
glad it was readible as the ol' neurons are firing on half power
>>>Sometimes I think the best defense for me is not speaking at all. Making myself scarce - because it feels nothing I say will make any difference at all. & in fact, speaking will give fuel to the fire. I feel helpless and become hopeless, which just isn't necessarily real. Or healthy.<<<silence can help in many situations. sometimes it isn't our place or battle to educate when in a situation involving manipulative behaviours....that's when a silent retreat can be helpful.
we share that helpless feeling which can of course lead to hopelessness....neither of which are healthy in the sense of overall well being.
wish our library had more refs. about this topic as we'd like to find better ways than silent retreat or attempted but fruitless dialogue with a person engaged in manipulative behaviours.
this conversation is indeed something with great value for many as manipulation can be so subtle that it takes a while to even realize and put words to the feelings that go along with newfound awareness or refound awareness.
for all those who are in the midst or just awakening from....welcome...pull up a chair and share how you've handled this matter in your lives....
poster:zenhussy
thread:730710
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/731404.html