Posted by LlurpsieBlossom on January 6, 2007, at 19:30:23
In reply to Sex again. Sigh., posted by Dinah on March 22, 2005, at 18:30:05
Hey,
I talked about this one twice with my T. she was really cute and had some helpful suggestions.1. on your terms. retaining a sense of control is essential. the freedom to say what is working and what is not. negotiate the terms while youre washing dishes or doing something totally unsexy (of course my horny husband often finds the most unsexy moments to express his desire. men...!)
2. figure out the part that is the scariest. is it the idea? the beginning? the nudity? the goofy noises? certain moves? the end?
3. Find a way to bypass the scary bits. example. maybe someone gets scared at the moment when the clothes start coming off and suddenly things are moving from playful to animal. I say WHOA. he says giddy-up! one way to bypass that is to set up the scenario ahead of time. the person scared of clothes coming off can take clothes off even BEFORE! the encounter occurs, with the full knowledge that this encounter will most likely involve MORE than playful smoochie smoochie.
4. my personal favorite. rules. husband may NOT use his hands. penalty is that I have to disable his hands. socks or tie him up. haha. then Im in control. surprise! husband likes rules. REALLY! it makes things a challenge. husband may not touch me here or there or in a box with a fox with green eggs or ham. perhaps, one could get snarky and have an airhorn set up on the bedside table. 3 strikes and he{s out of the game! (hey, if we have ^bases^ why cant he have strikes ??
lol
well, the important thing is that this is not rocket science. its a very goofy thing and is the adult equivalent of little kids smearing poop on the wall. (unless youre anal retentive, that is...)
lurps
poster:LlurpsieBlossom
thread:474222
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/719968.html