Posted by corafree on October 16, 2006, at 14:46:57 [reposted on October 28, 2006, at 0:27:27 | original URL]
In reply to Re: Rainydayman is really Icecreamman!, posted by Lindenblüte on October 15, 2006, at 22:36:40
Yep, yeah, well, oh h*ll this is hard!
Does anyone know a man that 'will help' me? A better man? Where do I look? I'm always mistaken as a younger woman when go out and then have these before-mid life men calling me and have to tell them to go away.
A lot of this is about Ritalin treatment as a child being 'like' methamphetamine as an adult. Parents get you through school on Ritalin and then just leave you hanging w/ nothing! Meth acts in the same way in him. W/ nothing, it's no wonder he found his own cure, too bad on the streets. Too bad someone didn't get him to a psych when he was younger. But, he goes to NA and is a 'clean' cat walking on the ceiling! He told me last night on phone he could feel his mania subsiding.
I've had all types of men. They all want something .. attention, to be complemented, of course sex, a cooker, a cleaner, a wage earner. I've been down that road a couple times. I've always given more than I've rec'd. They must spot that in me, or, maybe I give a lot 'to feel worthy'. That's prob' true. The first time I was told I was 'not good enough' ... I plummeted hard. No one had ever told me that before! I didn't know that to be true! But from my childhood sweetheart ... OMG it must have been true! I'm still running from that ... trying to be better. Always trying to better than normal.(?) Was my nose too big? Were my legs too thin? Was I just a loud mouth when I drank? He told me I didn't 'praise' him enough.
Think I need a good therapist. Ya' think?
Last eve' ICM shared info re: his family, ... which was really rare!! He's showing me his true self and telling me about his everyday life! What's going on!?
Something is happening. Oh. There's a planetary MALalignment going on NOW, and for a while. I'm feeling it as 'introspection' and 'reflection'.
TU for input Li.
love, cf
poster:corafree
thread:694528
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/698360.html