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Re: Transference with psychiatrist » AMB

Posted by Dinah on March 20, 2013, at 8:37:55

In reply to Re: Transference with psychiatrist, posted by AMB on March 19, 2013, at 22:03:40

> He said "it's like when you have sex on the third date and then they think it's a relationship, You never said it's a relationship, but they believe what they want to believe".

First, I agree with baseball55 about being entirely honest with your therapist, and with your DBT therapist as well. Some of the best work I did with my therapist came from discussing my feelings about the therapy relationship itself. You wouldn't think it, but it really does have an effect on the relationships outside therapy as well.

But didn't the above statement change your feelings about him? It's kind of insensitive and implies that he gets into bed with women knowing that the realities of the relationship might hurt them, but without clarifying those realities sufficiently to allow them to make a valid choice.

My therapist has made statements from time to time that have definitely lessened my idealization of him. Not precisely that statement, but statements of a similar level of... disillusioning.

In some ways I wish he hadn't. But in other ways I recognize the value of seeing him not only with the flaws I see *in* therapy, but also the flaws in his own nature.

 

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