Posted by Daisym on November 1, 2010, at 23:41:48
In reply to Re: Wordlessness » Daisym, posted by lucielu2 on November 1, 2010, at 21:27:28
Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. I wish I had the opportunity to do some art therapy; perhaps the wordless feelings would reveal themselves.
I took my post and told my therapist today that I didn't want to come but knew I should. He is wondering if this is a state that I was often in when I was younger - inarticulate, not daring to speak of any of this and far away from my feelings. Makes sense but it is still pretty awful. Plus two weeks ago he stepped on a land-mine - he asked a question that named a large fear that I've always had and I freaked out. Seriously and completely freaked out during the session - but laughably I said, "hang on - I need a minute, I can't exactly breathe." Because that is just me - "excuse me, I'm going to faint but I'll try not to inconvenience you..." I know we need to go back and talk about this but I can't seem to go there.
There are lots of changes going on right now for me, both in and out of my control. So I'll think more about that. I had a heath challenge and maybe that plays into this too. (I'm fine though.)
And I like the suggestion of writing but one of the distressing things about this is my words have fled my fingers too. And not writing for a writer is like a mini-death - like some piece of me has gone missing.
And yet I can - and I want - to post here. I'll have to think on this. I'm glad I still can.
poster:Daisym
thread:967870
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20101023/msgs/968012.html