Posted by lucie lu on March 9, 2009, at 7:54:00
In reply to Re: Anger, individuation, and taking risks (long), posted by DAisym on March 8, 2009, at 23:29:37
> "The second thing that I'm struggling with is, if I am making assumptions about him that are incorrect, why am I making those particular assumptions? I am having a really hard time trying to figure out what is real and what isn't. There is more here than I can post about tonight, and I need to think more about all this."
>
> Lucie,
>
> What jumps out at me here is you saying, "I am having a really hard time trying to figure out" -- isn't that what you AND your therapist should be doing together in therapy? As you begin to look at taking care of his feelings, perhaps (like me) you need to let go of trying to keep one step ahead of him too. For a very long time, I felt like I had to know where all our conversations were going or I had to identify my own pathology before he did. (yeah, sure.) I still do this to some extent.
>
> When we explore this, I find that I'm very afraid that I'll be too much or too hard, or too something -- and my therapist will opt to transfer or terminate me. I have to trust his professional abilities, as much as I have to trust his caring and our relationship.
>
> Man-oh-man, is this stuff hard! Good luck tomorrow.Oh YES!!! You captured it exactly.
poster:lucie lu
thread:884214
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090227/msgs/884566.html