Posted by SLS on February 23, 2009, at 10:35:51
In reply to Is There Anyone Here In Love With Their Therapist?, posted by sassyfrancesca on February 23, 2009, at 10:05:53
I am not savvy when it comes to the types of dynamics that can produce a situation like this. Is it counter-transference, or is it something worse. At this point, it *feels* to me as if it is something worse. I think he has fallen into a temptation that might be facilitated by his lack of feelings for his wife. He thinks he is in love with you, but I think he is living out a fantasy in his own mind. I am sure you appeal to him for many reasons, but I doubt he is truly in love with you because - and correct me if I'm wrong - the two of you have not interacted outside of sessions. You really don't know how you would interact with each other out in the real world.
Anyway, it sounds extremely unhealthy to me, and I also think that it is a breach of professional ethics for him to live out his fantasies by verbalizing them to a client. At the very least, these people should be trained to recognize and process counter-transferences when they occur. Whatever is going on, you are becoming more and more confident that this situation is not conducive to your working towards mental health. You are stuck while this stuff is going on. That's my guess, anyway.
I could have gone for my therapist too - if she weren't my therapist. I put those ideas to rest very quickly. I made sure that I didn't encourage or nurture feelings for her. There are lots of other people out there such that I don't entertain the notion that this person is the only woman out there for me. I decided not to $$$$ where I eat. As for her, if she has or had developed feelings for me at some point, I am sure she has dealt with them. In some states, like the one I live in, there are codes that prohibit a psychologist from having sex with a former client for a period of 2 years. Knowing this, why would I even bother taking a shot? I'm there to get well, not to look for a lover.
- Scott
poster:SLS
thread:881879
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/881884.html