Posted by seldomseen on December 31, 2008, at 10:44:11
In reply to Re: In the midst of it all, posted by Little Soul on December 30, 2008, at 23:50:52
I'm really sorry you are hurting this way, little soul.
I don't think you've gone off the deep end at all about your therapist's relationship. In fact, I think you may have hit on a very essential part of your therapy.
At the heart of what your saying I hear loud and clear that you are worried that your therapist will go away or change somehow now that she is in this relationship with this man. As long as she was unhappy, that was at least a common bond that you shared. Now, what do you have to keep her there? It's even worse because there is another person in her life.
All of these things hurt. The fear of abandonment and being left behind hurts. I do understand that, but it also shows that you have attached to and begun to trust your therapist. Despite all the hurt, these are really really good things. It takes a lot of time, though, for these feelings to be internalized and become secure.
It'll be okay though. What Dinah said is absolutely true, these feelings just kind of have to sit a while. It's hard because they demand sooooo much attention, but resting with them and talking about them can help.
As an aside, as adults, things tend to get sexualized a lot, and it all ends up as a jumbled mess. Try not to beat yourself up over wondering about their sexual relationship. I think that, along with the feelings, is normal - well, normal for therapy.
Take good care.
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:871513
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/871616.html