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Isolation, loneliness, and one-sided friendships

Posted by Racer on December 23, 2008, at 11:36:08

I've said in other posts that I no longer feel like a poster here, but this has been a major theme for me lately and bit my butt hard enough to leave a bruise last night, so...

Without going into details about my situation, I'm struggling with the issues in the subject line right now. I am isolated, with too few social resources, and no clue how to find new ones. Last night, I found myself crying in my car as I drove along, because it felt as though I was the one reaching out to others, with no one reaching out to me in return.

(This is Real Life, Face To Face Life, not electronic life, in which I have recently received a number of very heart-warming messages from people here. I appreciated those messages, and admit some brought those warm tears to my eyes, the sort that come because my heart cannot contain all the good feelings. Thank you.)

ThreeD Life, though -- how does one go about repairing one's social life after years of isolation? How does one make friends, when one is past a certain age? When one does not work? And how does one go about creating friendships in which others do some of the inviting, too?

Or at least return calls? Or maybe sometimes initiate the calls?

And how does one deal with those feelings of loneliness? Those fears that one can never escape it? Those fears of being unloved and unwanted forever?

Anyone here have any ideas? Can you share anything you've found that has helped you? (Can you send either a knight on a white charger, or at least space aliens to take me away so I can escape the next two weeks? Somehow, I'm thinking a rectal probe couldn't be worse than what I'm anticipating...)

Thanks. And I hope that someone benefits from these questions, whether or not anyone has any responses.


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:Racer thread:870481
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/870481.html