Posted by Nadezda on August 27, 2008, at 21:04:27
In reply to Wweeeelllll.... » wishingstar, posted by Racer on August 27, 2008, at 17:56:35
I was noticing in the archives from about a year ago that you had a lot of the same feelings about your current T (if your current T is the one you were writing about then.)
For example, here's a post from last May:
As much as I loved [G...] in the beginning, I'm starting to wonder if its not time for me to move on. Therapy has begun to feel like a complete waste of my time (and money). Basically the only thing I'm getting out of it right now is some attention.... we never get to a place where I'm exploring new ideas/connections or talking deeply about feelings or anything like that. I'm glad she gets it and sees how its all playing out, but I'm not going to pay to tell someone what I already know....
I saw her this Tues. I told her that I'd taken a mini-OD on Fri..... I just want to scream... Dont you hear me? Dont you hear how bad I'm feeling? ...
I've talked to her before about how I feel like shes not hearing me, but it doesnt seem to have any effect....."
Maybe it's just that there are times when these feelings arise, but many other times when you're working well, then it's certainly reasonable to stay.
But if it's more pervasive than that, and you're saying many of the same things now perhaps the dissatisfaction is signal of something deeply missing in the therapy. Truly, even if G is a very capable therapist, and a, likeable, engaging person, she simply might not T for you. Of course, it's hard to break away; despite everything, separation and loss are hard to face. But still, it becomes important, at some point, to begin to act on these feelings.
Maybe you could consult (as I did at one time) with another T about the therapy with G Or maybe you could look for another T, so you have somewhere to go. It's so hard to break away without a safety net-- that that would be totally understandable.
Also Racer's idea that someone with training in the area of eating disorders could be better a better choice resonates with me. Particularly since G doesn't respond so helpfully (IMO) to some of your comments-- as in the example you gave-- she may simply not be equipped to handle what you're going through.Feelings that therapy is useless or a waste of time do come up in quite good therapeutic relationships. But if they're ongoing and inescapable, at some point, it's too much; you need to take action-- either by talking more seriously with G, or beginning to think about how to end with her, even if it's extremely hard.
Nadezda
poster:Nadezda
thread:848324
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080826/msgs/848689.html