Posted by wishingstar on August 26, 2008, at 19:20:43
In reply to Re: Need to be taken seriously, posted by Nadezda on August 25, 2008, at 22:28:08
Thanks for the response nadezda... your perspective is helpful. I think the problem lies in what you said about whether or not T is good enough to "respond well enough to give you better experiences despite, or through responding to, these times" etc... I think that's the crux of the problem. I feel as though I'm feeding her the issues, and willing to work on them, but neither of us know where to go with it so we just pretend it doesnt exist. When I bring up my problems with therapy itself, she doesnt respond in a terribly helpful manner. I truly dont mind feeling uncomfortable in therapy... I dont mind leaving therapy and crying my eyes out.. if it feels productive. But when I leave and cry every week because I feel so invisible, worthless, unimportant, because of feeling ignored and devalued yet again... that's destructive. I dont see a light at the end of this tunnel. I dont feel as though this is part of the process (at this time, anyway) or something that will come out nicely and lead to growth in the end. I feel like it's teaching (reminding) me how to shut down, disengage (even though I'm not doing a very good job), etc. I spent my entire childhood feeling ignored, being told I didnt really feel the way I felt, etc... I dont need that from a therapist who I pay.
Please check out the response I wrote to annierose too. I want to be clear that I'm not saying this is 100% my Ts fault, or that I have no role in creating this problem. I'm sure I do. I wish I knew how to fix it.
poster:wishingstar
thread:848324
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080826/msgs/848486.html