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Re: holy crap! » raisinb

Posted by twinleaf on April 26, 2008, at 22:41:25

In reply to holy crap! » twinleaf, posted by raisinb on April 26, 2008, at 22:21:45

Well, raisin, HE is calm,secure and relaxed, and is trying to do his best to show me the way to becoming more so. I am sitting opposite, squeaky-voiced, sweating, while I twist and pull at my hair. This will probably sound even stranger than what I have already told you, but he has been setting the stage for the hour I just described for over six months, by, for instance, calmly mentioning his penis, as if it were a natural, safe part of all that has been occurring between us. I guess he got me desensitized by doing that, so that i was able to have fantasies about him, and also hang in there for what followed.

I have a background of csa, so this "safe experiencing" is actually very, very. very important for me. I have felt so much better since that hour- like I took a big step forward. Thinking of how he had the knowledge and personal courage to conduct therapy in this way almost takes my breath away.

 

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