Posted by Happyflower on April 6, 2008, at 19:40:35
In reply to Hi, I'm new here...and confused about my therapist, posted by stellabystarlight on April 6, 2008, at 18:56:22
Hi stellabystarlight,
Welcome to Babble, and yes you will others who have gone through some of the same things. Well I am one of them, I saw my T for 2 1/2, we had an incredible connection, and we were both attractive to each other. I am leaving a lot out, a lot is in the achives here of the last 3 years.He also had a hard time keeping the boundaries, I thought I was "special", I saw him outside of the office at the gym where he would snap towels at me, wink at me and always look at me. He also told me he wishes he could be social with me. It felt great at the time because I cared for him very much. But he struggled with those feelings for me and at times would put up and take away those boundaries, especially when I would out right ask him how he felt.
One time I asked him what he thought of me, and he just got really uncomfortable and told me he didn't care about me, he wouldn't attend my funeral if I died, and I forgot what else he said, but it hurt me so bad, I quit. Found another T who I am working with now for about 9 mo. now and my personal therapy has made a lot more progress in 6 mo. than in 2 1/2 years. Proabably because I am working on me instead of working out the hot and cold of my old T and me's relationship.For 6 mo. after leaving him, doing therapy because of him, I still feel hurt and angry about what he did. What is hard now, is that I still see him at the gym. Plus I see his wife and I am so tempted to tell her what a creep her husband is, but I don't. I also have some of the same friends that he does now. I didn't know they were even his friends until he told me.
I know it would be hard to do, but I would find another T. I don't like him telling you he will become depressed if you quit, that seems really selfish of him, you aren't supposed to be concerned with his needs. And I know it sounds cool that you are the only client he looks forward to, but do you really want to have a T who doesn't really like what he does? I know T's don't look forward to SOME clients, but not all their client except for one.
Please get away from him while you can, he is married and he is playing games with you. Take it from me, you will only get more hurt in the end. Here is a poem I wrote about it. Take care of youself.
Freudenstine's Eighth Floor PSYCHOtherapy
*
*
Nothing is the same now that its personal not professional.Denied feelings are as invasive as your golden trumpet vine
Growing insanely on your backyard pergola unstained.
Does she know what you think about when you water it?
Shared Super bowl birthdays, Sunburst racing, red tomatoes andWhipping out those orthotics while Grandma Moses looks away.
You burned for me Isnt Life Strange, why? BecauseFrozen gazes at the gym tell me what you want anyway.
Seducing me as you tell me you ate that chocolate vagina,Secretly mind f*ck*ng me while inside of her dreaming of
My steamy trumpet player red lips buzzing cure.
You tell me, what she doesnt know wont hurt her.
You try to hide your burning blush when IRemembered your birthday today.
But you used to be an admitted streaker,
You are not as opaque as you always say.
She doesnt care about the worlds largest music store.I bet shed care why you had the need to bring it up.
Does she know why her backyard blueberry bush
Bears more blueberries than before?
My life isnt one of your juggling balls on your shelf,My feelings are not yours to twist on your Rubik cube,
I am not another one of your jolly joy play toy,
I am not your new fountain of youth game.
My dedicated solo was a goodbye to you,Even if you didnt show, tough.
I wish I could hate you, times two.
I have trusted you enough.
This is no land of make believe.Remember the oath to do no harm?
Does that apply to your wife as well?
Oh, yeah, you did tell me you are a very good liar.
poster:Happyflower
thread:821872
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080405/msgs/821885.html