Posted by rskontos on February 3, 2008, at 18:54:37
DAisym,
Well, to answer your question of what my vision of a dependent relationship would be in the context of a therapist relationship, I will have to answer in terms of what I think my p-doc wants. He wants me to replace the abusive relationship of my parents with him. I think I will find this next to impossible. To even think about it as dependent will be hard. I had to survive on my own as a young child in a household with a very scary psycho mother and distant father. The things I witnessed must have been so bad that I dissociated to the point I have zero recollection. I have many 5 total memories and they are fragments. What is coming back in my flashbacks are not pretty and very frightening. I had no grandparents, they were around, but distant as well on both sides, so as children my sisters and I did not have anyone. I did not turn to teachers or church members I turn in my head. And no one IRL ever knew. I hid what went on at home well. It was imperative. So to be dependent on anyone is hard. I don't know how....I don't know relationships much either. This weekend was my bday and that went well but sometimes I even am uncomfortable with my family. So for me to be dependent on him, it is so hard .As I told him my way of just shutting down everything and going internal inside my head is so much more natural. That the concept of dependent, reliant, or any other term is so alien it is hard to understand outside of knowing the word in the dictionary. I resist being dependent on my husband. Is this what you were asking?
rsk
poster:rskontos
thread:810610
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080126/msgs/810610.html