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Re: Sorry, many questions, many good answers

Posted by Muffled on November 29, 2007, at 22:17:42

In reply to Re: Sorry, many questions, many good answers, posted by rskontos on November 29, 2007, at 20:57:29

> Muffled I know what you are asking because I have been asking people I think aren't split how they remember things too. To try and validate how we don't remember them right?

*there's alot I don't remember. And yes, I have in offhand ways asked others what they remember, cuz I try to understand whether my memory is bad , or if noone remembers stuff.

> When you dissaociate it takes all the memory the good and the bad so you cant remember the tree or climbing or if you liked it. Because you might have been climbing to escape the bad guys...:(

*I have some memories. Mostly just pictures. But NO emotion, and very few people. I also am often so unsure if I am actually remembering something on my own, or something a sibling has told me, or a picture I have seen etc. But I DO know and remember I liked to go outside and climb trees. See there is a part that I have that DOES remember lotsa good stuff I liked to do. But not people. Or emotions. But I know I climbed trees really high and swayed in the wind.
>
> Is it because Muffy you want to know how others with intact memories remember stuff?

*I just don't know how it works? How it feels? Alls I know is my own experience, and as I look into it, I am realizing that my way of experiencing the world is not the average way. So I just wonder how it is for most? How it feels for them. Then maybe I can feel that way too. Learn to feel and remember normally. But I not sure what normal is.
I am still learning.
This is what my T wrote:
"You have been very and I mean very skilled at keeping things separate, split. This is perhaps how you have managed to keep going."
It was weird to see it in writing. Writing is a big deal to me. Words. I still deny that I split lotsa times. Then it'll smack me clearly that I am. But sometimes in calm times, I wouldn't know. I didn't used to know a few years back. All I knew is I was always so confused so much and had so much headnoise and was so all over. Now its more sense. So that better.
I just want to know who I am.
M

 

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poster:Muffled thread:797701
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