Posted by ElaineM on February 13, 2007, at 15:39:04
In reply to Re: Not good ***trig SI » ElaineM, posted by MidnightBlue on February 13, 2007, at 0:29:32
((((MB)))) you always say something. sorry I'm so low. So desperately sad, I can't stand it. My eyes feel like fire from crying - Like shampoo in your eyes.
>>>Hugs (NICE hugs not hurtful ones)
Online hugs are always good cause you only feel them in your heart, and not on your body. Plus you never have to return them. never *have* to do anything.
Sometimes I just can't get rid of the feeling that I don't belong here -- Like, in the world. And it feels so much like the truth, and so logical and clear, next to everything else that happened to me, and going on now. And I sometimes just can't believe that not existing wouldn't be better. Even when I'm good and as close to happy as I get, this thought is always there. When i'm doing really bad, it gets bigger.
If suffering just had a deadline, then I could do it. I'm really really good at taking pain and emotional stuff too. I can take anything, if I know when it's gonna end. But an end doesn't come all the time to everyone. I've seen it happen that way. I don't want that to be me.
:(
thanks for listening to my cr@p, el
poster:ElaineM
thread:729230
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070203/msgs/732458.html