Posted by muffled on October 17, 2006, at 22:36:34
In reply to Re: Meeting a nurturing/mothering need, posted by littleone on October 17, 2006, at 21:51:06
> I've done some of the things that you suggested as part of learning to soothe and comfort myself. And I find them invaluable. They do help the young part a lot to cope with emotions especially.
>
> I guess I see the nurturing/mothering need different to that. I guess nurturing/mothering is the behaviour and the actual needs met would be the need to feel loved, the need to feel accepted, the need to feel a sense of belonging and others that I'm having trouble articulating.*like unconditional acceptance???
> I'm not really sure that you can get those things from self soothing.*I think mebbe it helps to accept and love all your parts.
>
> And I have a lot of trouble mothering myself. Maybe because it wasn't demonstrated to me. I can organise things so that the young parts are able to do young things they enjoy and find helpful. But I can't really nurture them as such. I just don't know how to do that. I don't know how to talk to them (or anyone for that matter) in a nurturing and compassionate way.*Its weird, I can sometimes nurture my irl kids, i think I am anyways. And sometimes I just not there for them...
My inside kids...well...I treat them mostly ok. I got one thats making me nuts. She proly could use nuture, but sometimes I just hate her :-(
So I wouldn't say I was the queen of nurture. I only have been able to even SAY that word recently. That and 'needs', don't much like that word either...
>
> I'm sure you guys would be able to see that from the way I post here. I think that's one of the broken things inside me.* I hadn't noticed that. But I miss alot of stuff.
If it IS broken, then it can be fixed. There is likely a whole lotta other sh*t all mixed in and thats why its so danged hard to figger this stuff out.
Nice to see you posting littleone.
Take care,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:695580
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061012/msgs/695700.html