Posted by caraher on October 16, 2006, at 6:32:24
In reply to Re: more2 » Lindenblüte, posted by ElaineM on October 15, 2006, at 22:40:23
> I don't know how much I'll post now. T is back and he sent a scary (not violent scary) email. I'm scared. He is upset that I've been missing sessions cause of doc and dentist appointments. (I had an unsuccessful, second! round of endo done on rootcanal#2 last week. He may want to pull it :-( I'm gonna beg for one more round.) But he says I'm not proving that I want to be coming to see him.
I'm sorry, but what a huge a$$hole! Here you are with all this medical $hit, that he knows about, and he's trying to guilt trip you for not seeing him when you're seeing doctors and dentists? What a colossal jerk!
You don't owe him a lick of "proof you want to see him." Whether he's your T or your friend. That just shows how sick he must be (if you're inclined to be more charitable toward him than I am!). Tell him I said so! (OK, I know you probably don't want to even hint that you talk about him - just challenge him about that. Does he want you to get sicker and lose all your teeth? That doesn't sound like a very loving wish!)
How about if he shows some proof that he wants what's good for you instead of desiring to control all your actions and cater to his needs? Not that he hasn't done some good things on your behalf... my point is (partly) that you could, with even more justice, level the charge against him that he hasn't "proven" that he values your needs.
He really seems to view you as his personal property. This is just another form of abuse, no matter how much sentimental window dressing comes with it. He might not be aware of how bad it is, since he's so caught up in his own feelings and getting his own emotional needs met.
In case you can't tell, I'm angry with him right now!
Random thought - do you go to a church or have any religious affiliation? Perhaps something like that could be a source of counseling or at least a sympathetic ear outside the medical establishment (i.e. among people you won't be afraid know your T).
poster:caraher
thread:694836
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061012/msgs/695232.html