Posted by Racer on September 7, 2006, at 15:42:37
In reply to Falling off the pedestal, posted by littleone on September 6, 2006, at 21:52:08
This discussion is really interesting to me, because i have a hard time with this, too. In my case, I struggle so much NOT to allow my T to be anything more than my equal. It does interfere with therapy, because I want her to be an Authority Figure for me, I crave that sense of safety, and to be able to ask her to protect me, and to be able to lay my burdens down at her feet -- but I resist that so strongly! I can't ask her to protect me, because she won't. I can't ask her to be more than human, because she'll reject me for wanting it. Etc.
One of the things we kinda sorta work on is me feeling able to call her when I feel as though I need to. I have done it once or twice, but it's veyr rare. I emailed her this weekend, but it apparently didn't go through. (AOL doesn't like my emails...) Mostly, though, I'm the one who walks in saying, "I spent three hours sitting there with the telephone in my hand, but couldn't call you..." Or, "I almost called you, but then decided I had to take care of myself."
Hell, a year ago I checked myself into the psych ward for a few days, rather than call her when I was in crisis! And I was so proud of myself for not bothering her!
Ah, same coin... It's anyone's guess which side is better -- maybe we all hope it eventually lands on its edge?
poster:Racer
thread:683806
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/684003.html