Posted by Dinah on September 8, 2006, at 9:57:34
In reply to Follow up question, posted by Daisym on September 7, 2006, at 23:59:16
I think my answer is two part.
I think originally I might have defended against my therapist that way.
But that despite my defenses there was something about therapy, and about my therapist in specific, something about his way of being, that soothed me. It made no sense, as I knew he was just a flawed man like everyone else, so I did see it as magic. Still do in a way, although I guess it's no more magic than the agitation I get in a crowded room.
Of course, the flip side to his "magic" qualities annoy me from time to time. Serene/phlegmatic accepting/not pushing me. But I always accept that the better comes with the bitter, and I generally find it rather amusing.
Seeing him disintegrate under pressure worse than I did was a different matter of course. And seeing him do things that were objectively bad under the precepts of his profession under that pressure was not so good. My interim therapist said that no matter how I tried, I'd never be able to forget what happened, and it would change the therapeutic relationship forever. My therapist is more than a bit miffed about that, and I'm trying to make it not so. I haven't succeeded yet, obviously, but it's early days yet. And I never underestimate my ability to forget.
But I don't suppose that's a widely generalizable situation.
poster:Dinah
thread:683806
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060826/msgs/684221.html