Posted by Jost on July 12, 2006, at 10:53:42
In reply to am I expecting too much?, posted by wishingstar on July 11, 2006, at 19:40:21
Wishingstar, the short answer to your question is, no. You're not expecting "too much. "
"Too much" is something that exists in particular ways in particular relationships. You may need something your T can't give you.
Or you may need to work with a T (not necessarily this T) on issues having to do with needing, getting needs met, containing and expressing needs in a way that is more likely to get them met enough -- and so on --
But there is no per se "too much." You need what you need; and you deserve clear expectations, so that you know what your T is willing to give, what her limits are, and then whether they feel right and good to you.
Maybe no T will give you "everything" (in fact no T will, or can), but there are Ts who can give you enough, and help you find them and feel safe enough, and care about enough.
I get the feeling that this issue really needs to be addressed urgently because you've written about it for a while.
At least find out her parameters for returning calls, for asking about how you feel, for showing you in some way (telling you in some way that you can feel as real) that she cares.
Sorry, have to go, I'll check back later,
Jost
poster:Jost
thread:666165
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060703/msgs/666325.html