Posted by All Done on June 10, 2006, at 0:52:16
In reply to My Therapist's Answer, posted by Daisym on June 1, 2006, at 0:33:08
> He said, "usually, but not always." "Depends"
>
> And then he sort of grinned and said, "not very helpful, am I?" Nope!But I think he's probably right. :-)
> Together we tried to sort through the external issue of wanting something (I did NOT use hugs as an example) and the internal issue of why I might want something. Like, I know talking about my childhood has been disruptive in so many ways and it may well have been better left alone -- not discussed. But internally there was a need to share it with someone.Once you discover the internal need, it doesn't make the external need go away, though, does it?
> But I agree with Dinah. It is so true of human beings that the forbidden becomes the obsession. And I've never believed that one size fits all. The one thing I do know is that many of the "rules" of therapy are to protect therapists from us, not the other way around. And I can understand this, as hurtful as it is sometimes.
>
> So my first question I'd want answered is "do you hug clients." And then I might ask for one.
>
> Therapy is so, so, so hard.
> Hang in there.Thanks, Daisy. It's too hard right now. I managed to ask him if he has a policy about contact after termination (not because I'm terminating anytime soon, of course). He said he doesn't think he has any "policies" other than working with the client to make sure therapy is beneficial...blah, blah, blah. It would have been the perfect opportunity to ask about hugs, but I couldn't get myself to do it.
poster:All Done
thread:650795
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060604/msgs/655113.html