Posted by frida on October 2, 2005, at 2:16:11
In reply to abusers, posted by lostforwards on October 1, 2005, at 11:42:41
Hi..
I've talked about this with my T since my father abused me for many years, since I was little till he died. :-(
My view is that he did know that he was causing pain but that he viewed me as an object, not his daughter, or a little girl or person. He enjoyed watching me suffer. He truly enjoyed hurting, humiliating me. He never showed any regret, not even the moment before dying. For him, I had caused everything for "being the way I was". He didn't care about the damage he inflicted on me for more than 10 years. He really didn't care. And never thought that it was "wrong" of him or that he was damaging and breaking me inside forever. He couldn't avoid doing what he did, and he enjoyed it through the years. It was what I deserved. I think he truly just didn't care about the damage, and he never ever regretted it or thought that it could have been wrong. Not even when he was dying.
Now, reading Daisy's post, I feel scared that if my T were to treat an abuser as a patient it would hurt me so much :-( I guess I'll have to ask her if she would. It brought tears to my eyes just to imagine.
As it has been said, maybe some abusers are aware (at moments) about the damage they are causing, but I don't think they are the majority.I think people who torture and abuse others that way don't think they are doing something wrong.
sorry I'm rambling.
Frida
> Are abusers aware of the abuse they inflict on others? Is it possible for an abuser to be completely unaware of what they're doing to others in their life?
poster:frida
thread:561587
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051001/msgs/561839.html