Posted by daisym on August 19, 2005, at 0:50:30
In reply to Attachment, posted by alexandra_k on August 18, 2005, at 18:44:14
This is a hard one. I love my mom. I've never doubted that she loved me. She just didn't have time to be my mom, only my mentor. She is very proud of me, and tells me all the things I could be...I have so much potential. I guess working with little kids wasn't her idea of success for me.
I think one of the reasons my therapist has encouraged this deep attachment and dependency is that I was never allowed to express just the emotional parts of needing a mom. If I had a problem, I had to come up with the solution. Nothing could just be bad. Or sad. Or unsolvable.
I think this is why I get upset when we try to problem solve in therapy. It isn't that I think his suggestions are out of line, I just want him to let some things be unsolvable, at least for now. I rail against feeling my feelings, but it is exactly what I need and want to do in therapy, with my therapist. I shudder to think what my mother would think of how I act with my therapist.
I still think it is interesting that I always freak out about being abandoned just after I've told him something that deepens my attachment.
poster:daisym
thread:543620
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050813/msgs/543762.html