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Re: Need help, but too triggered to write. :(

Posted by LittleGirlLost on June 24, 2005, at 23:27:58

In reply to Re: Need help, but too triggered to write. :(, posted by LittleGirlLost on June 24, 2005, at 13:20:41

> What's also really really bothering me, is I sort of just started dating someone, and I am so SO conflicted. He seems nice (for a guy), but I am so nervous and fearful. I've always wanted to be married and all that, but I am so afraid. (I've also been living on my own for about 10-12 years, and I guess becoming "set in my ways" doesn't help matters either.) The conflict is that as much as I want a relationship with a man, I want a mom more than anything! The "little" part of me (which is actually quite large) says that boys are yucky and I just want a mommy and nothing else; or at least you are supposed to have the mom FIRST. i can't say anymore about this now; hurting too much. :(
>
> lgl

Hasn't anyone else experienced this? How about you that are married; how'd you do it? I just feel stuck. :(
Oh and I called my T tonight. That helped, just not as much as being with her would; but I am glad I am allowed to call.

I'm worried about something else too. This is something I finally opened up about (a little anyway), and now I see her next week, but she will be away the following week. I really want to try to pick up next week where we left off this week, but I don't like to get into anything too heavy before she leaves. I don't want to put it off either because I finally made a step. I don't know what to do. I was thinking of asking her if I can see her twice next week: Once to go further with what I brought up, and once to have the "light - before you go away" session. (or maybe just have an extended session on our usual night.) Part of me wonders though if this is something I really want, (I mean, it's hard enough to talk/get through one session, why would I set myself up for two), or am I just so desperate to see her again that I feel that this is what I want *at this moment*. I'm scared.

lgl

 

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poster:LittleGirlLost thread:518024
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050622/msgs/518453.html