Posted by pinkeye on June 23, 2005, at 14:25:46
In reply to Re: Confusing Session (long) » Daisym, posted by daisym on June 22, 2005, at 23:52:12
Hi Daisy,
From what I did - the key to working through these sexual feelings is again and again directing your mental focus to what you really feel/want rather than focussing on your T so much.That is what I have been doing - whenever I feel like thinking about my ex T, nowadays, I try to look for what I thought he really stood for - caring/gentle/authoritative/father like/even abusive/unavailable/unemotional/logical/ - what attributes he has and how I feel about the attributes rather than focussing on him as a person. And also I think of my own response to different attributes - if I think of him as my father like, then I think of what it would mean to me to have a relationship with a father like person - if he would repeat the same mistakes/abuses that my father did. If I think he is not like my father - then I think what it would mean to me have a relationship wiht a person who is not so much like my father.
And some insight I found was that - it didn't really so much matter to me what my ex T thought of me or what he really is - I was more influenced by what I felt about myself.. If I felt I deserved a caring/gentle/affectionate/available person or if I felt my body is disgusting/or hate myself/or think I should be treated in an abusive way by my husband.
poster:pinkeye
thread:516928
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050622/msgs/517545.html