Posted by littleone on February 28, 2005, at 20:14:48
In reply to Prognosis, posted by fallsfall on February 28, 2005, at 17:32:59
Here are some very quick thoughts falls.
> My therapist and I have been talking about going back to work. I would like to go back to work, but I'm terrified to do so.
I don't think you've really clarified anywhere in this post whether you are thinking of full time work or part time. I've never worked part time myself, but I would think they would feel very different. Is it possible that your goal could be to work x hours per week rather than aiming for a full time job? I'm not sure if that would be feasible if you're getting some sort of disability benefits.
> So, for me, the question about going back to work seems to boil down to whether I can find a work environment that will be less likely to speed up and deepen the crash, and whether I can have a support structure in place to keep the crash from being worse than it absolutely has to.
>
> My therapist wasn't thrilled with this thinking. He thinks (and he is probably right) that if I go into this expecting to crash that it will be a self-fullfilling prophesy. My argument is that I need to have contingencies for the real risks I would be taking.I think you're being very smart and careful. It would be unwise to work towards these targets without a safety net/backup plan of some sort. But by the same token, your T does make a valid point.
I think it would be important to ensure that your safety net/backup plan isn't something that you will unconsciously aim for. That all parts of you realise that working is a more attractive option than the backup. I think that would take quite some work with your T. I would tend to think that then you won't be as likely to expect a crash. You will be more focussed on attaining your goals.
>
> But what kind of choice do I have? I only have one life. I can spend it being depressed because I'm not working/can't work/are afraid to work. Or I can hope for some good years and prepare for the inevitable crash.There are other options to working you know. Volunteering is one that springs to mind. And there are more informal work environments, eg tutoring kids, etc. Sorry, I'm not trying to invalidate you, just trying to broaden your options if you feel backed into a corner.
>
> Trying to believe that I will ever be "well" seems a lot like lying to myself.I must admit I did get a little lost with your %'s. So I'm a little confused as to what your T thinks your prognosis is like. But I hope he disputes this idea of yours. How can you continue therapy without hope?
poster:littleone
thread:464547
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050225/msgs/464622.html