Posted by daisym on November 13, 2004, at 18:08:18
In reply to Re: Hello, I'm Daisy and I go to therapy a lot... » daisym, posted by JenStar on November 12, 2004, at 21:31:33
Jen,
I liked both of your responses. I'm a pretty private person so I think only 6 or 7 people know I'm in therapy. But that is OK, it isn't something I really want to talk about with just anyone anyway. But this friend is a retired therapist...and she recommended my therapist in the first place. But I'm realizing that she was more short-term, somatic memory based kinds of stuff. She did a lot of body stuff with older people and athletes. She talks a lot about making choices and taking action. My therapist talks more about feelings and healing over time. Anyway, they are very different, though they respect each other as colleagues. I just didn't expect her initial reaction to the amount I'm going to be what it was. But I can understand it.
I agree with normalizing the process. I have to do it for myself first! As necessary as it all feels, I still don't understand where all these little kid feelings came from and why I can't control them. Totally screws with who I thought I was.
My therapist has said that most of my life has been built on borrowed internal constructs... I'm a hodge-podge of what everyone expects me to be or what I think they want me to be. Finding my true self is going to take sometime. In the meantime, I feel shaky because I have no real core self to fall back on, I feel like I've been bulldozed. He encourages me to borrow his until mine is formed and strong. If I do that I think I can make it through all of this.
poster:daisym
thread:415161
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041113/msgs/415569.html