Posted by antigua on August 28, 2004, at 10:47:14
In reply to discovering anger and hostility for the first time, posted by alexandra_k on August 27, 2004, at 20:41:52
I think it's wonderful that you're discovering anger and hostility for the first time (as an adult, I assume?) Anger and hostility turned inward, you probably already know, results in depression, which is the route I've always taken.
My father abused me as a child and I learned very early on that I couldn't express anger or he would leave me. It became a life-long pattern that I have been working to break. It may sound funny, but I'm stil working on being angry at my father for what happened. I can feel it in spurts, but I don't feel the all-out anger I am entitled to feel.I can express anger in my everyday life--with my husband and children, but not w/my mother interestingly enough, because I trust them and I know my children need a strong role model.
But I can't express anger over what happened to me. I work on it, and experience it occasionally but what I really want is to let it all out. I know it's bottled up inside. I've tried EMDR and that helps a little.I'm afraid of my anger. I'm afraid that if I let it out, I will lose control.
So, you certainly aren't alone. I think it's a good thing this is happening to you.
best,
antigua
poster:antigua
thread:383161
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040828/msgs/383305.html