Posted by alexandra_k on February 4, 2004, at 18:50:31
In reply to ok, now it hurts, posted by crushedout on February 3, 2004, at 23:06:11
Hi crushedout. I am so proud of you for emailing your T. That took a lot of courage. I have been doing some reading on the net about transference, reading different perspectives on it because I have been thinking about it a lot lately....
I appreciate that my situation may well be different from yours in that I tend to get transference for most T's / p-docs who are intelligent and pay me a bit of attention (sigh). Whereas it sounds like you don't get it for random people so much as this particular T.
There is some stuff on how one just never knows what might have happened had you met in a different setting... That being said, one never could know because that didn't happen. Maybe if you did have a relationship things would work out - but then again maybe not.
If you did end up having a relationship then how would you feel about her seeing other male clients? Do you think that there would likely be severe trust issues around her boundaries with other clients? Do you think that you would greatly miss not having such a wonderful T to talk to?
I think that it is great that you are being honest with your T about this issue. You have inspired me to broach it in the future should it recurr (and I am fairly resigned to the fact that it probably will.... sigh).
What doesn't kill us makes us stronge;, I do so hope that this turns into a positive experience for you. ((((crushedout)))) I do so hope that you feel better soon :-)
poster:alexandra_k
thread:309129
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040131/msgs/309469.html