Posted by Karen_kay on December 12, 2003, at 10:58:39
In reply to Re: Karen's rant (this n's good) » Karen_kay, posted by DaisyM on December 11, 2003, at 19:52:10
He didn't say much about my dreams. Just basically agreed with what I had to say about them. He keeps pushing me to talk about my dad. I know, I told him to push me. He has to push me or we won't get beyond the regular chit chat. And I suppose in a way I'm glad he pushed me. I had another dream last night. The strange thing about dreams is that they seem so very real. I awoke wondering "Was I awake, did I just remember something?" I'm fairly certain I was asleep. I don't know anymore. I was laying in bed last night trying to remember basic things about my dad and my childhood home. Strange, but my memory loss is so severe that I can't remember what my childhood house looked like and I lived there for 19 years. Well, I was laying there and I remembered what my bathroom door sounded like when it opened. It made a strange sound because it kinda rubbed against the frame when it opened. It is a horrible sound. And I also can recall watching my father bathe. I don't know why I watched my dad take a bath but I can recall exactly how he used to take a bath. Odd. Anyway, back to my dream....
I was sitting around a table with my boyfriend Andy and we were talking and I called him Glenn (that's my dad's name). As soon as I said it I was full of terror and I looked up and my dad was sitting there. The room started spinning and I got up to run and I fell on the floor and he raped me. When he was done he was on top of me and he started crying. Then I woke up.
I don't know if this has something to do with what my therapist said about crying with me or what? But I also remember walking in on my mom and dad talking once and he was crying. That was the only time I ever saw my dad cry. My mom made me leave the room. It was strange. It made me cry to see my dad crying.
poster:Karen_kay
thread:288100
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031202/msgs/289095.html