Posted by zenhussy on December 11, 2003, at 15:30:01
In reply to Karen's rant (this n's good), posted by Karen_kay on December 11, 2003, at 15:05:33
> He did say something interesting today though. He said that if I started to cry it was ok. And I started in about how it is NOT ok to cry...blah blah, ect.. And he said, "I might start crying too." Is that weird? Is it common for a therapist to cry with their client? I told him it would be really odd and strange for me if he started crying too. He said that it is ok for a person to be overcome with emotion and cry. I think if he cried I would freak out. It would be sweet, but I might start laughing hysterically because I would feel very strange. What do you think?
Karen_kay,
I've had many therapists over the years who have cried at times when someone would have to be a stone cold lug to not do so. Sure when I was younger and in therapy it freaked the hell outta me but now that I've gone through many stages of understanding just what it is I went through I'm rather glad I've had compassionate therapists who've been human enough to cry.
Their tears helped me normalize and understand the magnitude of what occured in my life. I for many years tried to believe that I was fine. I wasn't. Once I was able to cry in a therpist's office it was a huge relief. Finding out that sometimes they cry too was comforting. For me being with a therapist who is gentle and kind is essential to dealing with the trauma work I face.
I've learned so much by knowing that other people feel pain after hearing about the traumas I've experienced. Their demonstrations of tears have shown me that, if anything, I *need* to be more upset about what I've been through. They helped show me the emotions I could use. Ranging from anger to sadness with tears. I was so frozen and used to faking I was okay that I needed their modeling.
zenhussy
poster:zenhussy
thread:288100
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20031202/msgs/288839.html