Posted by Medusa on October 7, 2002, at 8:12:29
DH dragged me to see his "family systems analyst". She took all his complaints about me, turned them on him, and gave him homework.
We went back. I said I was blocked on my job search. She rustled around a bit and pulled out ... my mother.
True enough. My mother finds it bad enough that I went to College X, married a gentle, handsome man, and have freedom and a life. When I had a severe bike accident and got knocked off the career track, my mother actually seemed happy, and congratulated me for keeping my weight down despite the inactivity.
But I can't seem to get the homework straight. First I was supposed to write a letter to my mother about her reaction to the bike accident. I had trouble with that (guess I better try again though) and then the shrink changed the assignment a bit, well a lot, and I'm having even more trouble.
In a phone call in which she asked more questions about my mother's family, the counselor suggested that mum's father's early death might explain my mother's emotional unavailability.
Dang I just want a job. But I really, truly am blocked here, and I bet the therapist is right, that the root of a lot of it is my mother's wish for me to fail. So we could be closer or something.
But ... isn't all this mother stuff really outmoded and passé?
The therapist even gave me little wooden blocks, one 'female' and one 'male', to represent my parents, or the anima and animus or something.
Any experiences with stuff like this? This counselor managed to cut DH's umbilical cord (which was wrapped around his neck AND attached to both parents, imagine!) so I have to do this work, but I have no idea how to move forward.
Rambling and lost,
M
poster:Medusa
thread:1237
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20020829/msgs/1237.html