Posted by violette on July 11, 2010, at 20:43:02
In reply to Re: Is Anybody Responsible for Their Own Feelings? » violette, posted by ron1953 on July 11, 2010, at 19:02:09
Ron, I think I hear you better now.
Yeah, I understand the dynamics are different with work-but in terms of taking responsiblity for one's feelings, which is why I brought up an example that illustrates that concept so clearly (and strongly)--why the hell should everyone ELSE have to leave the company instead of the as***** boss taking responsibility for his emotional dumping on others?
Being less sensitive to others' cruelty, though it does not happen that often, is something I'm working on in therapy since it relates to childhood issues...
I'm starting to not question myself as much..but before this, I more likely than not unconsciously interpreted another's abuse as an indication there was something 'wrong with me'...for someone to choose me personally as an outlet of their anger is not seemingly as personal as I once viewed it to be...and I continue to learn while I write things out here and elsewhere.
However, in growing tired of questioning myself, thinking it 'must be me', I have started to realize sometimes my reactions can be 'normal' reactions to abnormal situations, so I am getting better at dealing with this issue. And no, I don't get triggered-hurt-that easily where I'm feeling offended often...it comes from identifying behaviors that match childhood experiences, and what seems to parallel abuse-which seems to originate from another person's own adverse experiences-whether they recognize it or not. Being there is no logic to explain this, I do guess and come to my own conclusions-whether right or wrong.
I, too, believe in directness (being forthright) and honesty. In fact, I feel strongly about that and when others are not so forthright, it can be triggering at times...depending on the situation-esp. if someone won't look into themself...
It seems we do agree on something here...Anyway, thanks for empathisizing in regard to one of my IRL situation and being transparent in how you feel about this. It seems to be a productive discussion as I'm always learning. :)
poster:violette
thread:953893
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20100321/msgs/954155.html