Posted by muffled on November 6, 2006, at 14:44:41
In reply to Re: a way for there to be less hurt » muffled, posted by ClearSkies on November 6, 2006, at 13:52:01
> Muffled, when I see that a poster is blocked, I keep in mind that the blocks don't come out of the blue - that folks are asked to be civil. If someone is uncivil again, then there's the block. It isn't as if we aren't given the chance to think about what we post. The requests to be civil are the reminder to a poster that as upset/angry/hurt/confused they might be, they still have to abide by Dr Bob's rules of the site.
Someone asked me this: "Is it true that technically, once a person has received one PBC *ever,* they may be blocked immediately with no warning from then on. And that this does in fact happen. (And not just in what most would agree are cases of blatant incivility.)"
And yes I am VERY aware that this is Bobs site. VERY aware.
>
> BTW, I think it would supportive for the community as a whole to have the previous requests to be civil linked in the blocking post. It seems to me that part of the anger I see here when blocks happen is not knowing where the preliminary warnings were (not always on the same thread or the same board).***EXACTLY CS. But not so much linked, as an actual warning IN THAT THREAD. I generally warn my kids before I lash out with my harshest of punishments. I don't ground them instantly after warning them some other time over some other transgression that they proly long forgotten...
>
> Yes, blocks do hurt the posters who are blocked. And people who are blocked are asked to be civil first.**But the KEY, is that statement from someone I pasted above....that they are not warned AT THE TIME... its extreemly possible, perhaps in many cases probable, that the poster DOES NOT REALIZE that he/she is crossing the civility lines. Which Bob himself admits are not always that clear...
To me, if someone is uncivil again, then they are doing so with the knowledge that they might (ok, probably) be blocked. How can we say that someone else is hurting us when we do the hurting to ourselves?
**But thats the problem...sigh...we DON'T recognize when we getting close to or are crossing the line, sometimes there's warnings, sometimes NOT. Its the NOT, that I have a problem with.
I hurt myself ALOT CS. I cut myself, I punch trees, I do stupid things I KNOW are hurtful to me. Does that mean Bob should rub my nose in it? Banish me for being the complete sh*thead that I am? Being a sh*thead, I have compassion for others of my ilk, and prefer to give them the benefit of the doubt, cuz i KNOW how much they already hurt themselves....
>
> Perhaps it is that the significance of requests to be civil isn't understood clearly enough. Maybe PBC's could be given with the caveat clearly stated that further incivilities might (will) result in a block. Would such a fair warning help, do you think?***Not if they not in the SAME thread. There is already caveates on those things I think.
Thanks CS for boldly stepping in. No offense to YOU. Its the SITUATION that bedevils me.
I'm kinda screwed up.
But I learning.
And I think I getting awful damn close to that f*cking magical mysterious f*cking line.
And I could be blocked.
Banished.
Right now.
No warning.
Cuz I just not sure..
I feel strongly...
But I goto shut the f*ck up.
poster:muffled
thread:696019
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20061018/msgs/700934.html