Posted by verne on October 6, 2005, at 0:23:30
In reply to Re: 44 days and wondering..., posted by tizza on October 5, 2005, at 23:33:40
Paul, I'll try that talking to the mirror. Sometimes just looking into the mirror "wakes" me up. Being borderline, I honestly forget who I am, I don't have a good grip, and my reflection has been enough to bring me back.
I agree with you about AA, it actually drove me to drink. I first found real freedom and peace from alcohol after a spiritual experience. At first I ascribed it to that particular church or denomination but soon realized the Spirit of Peace wasn't peculiar to any one religion.
I still don't believe in anything particular in my head, yet, nevertheless, something touched me, changed my heart, and I haven't been the same since. I still struggle but there's a deep abiding peace that remains unchanged - even when I fall.
Anyway, I gave up on formal church and AA but would like to find a 12 step group that is spiritual without being religious about it.
And one more thought. Talking and "philosophising" about my alcoholism has never helped me. I've had great gab sessions with like-minded people, we'd reason everything out and get it all under control; later, however, I would feel empty and more vulnerable than ever. So for me, "insight" isn't enough.
back to the mirror
verne
poster:verne
thread:562537
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20050914/msgs/563568.html