Posted by ClearSkies on June 17, 2008, at 7:55:07
In reply to Going under, posted by Tabitha on June 17, 2008, at 1:33:00
I don't think those internet suggestions were very helpful. It does sound more like something that you're being thrust into, and to turn to a distracting, happy-time activity would be like saying, "pay no attention to the man behind the curtain."
My take is that we have to honor these unhappy times we experience. We've experienced a loss; we've been triggered about past losses; we've been made to see the shortcomings of a relationship. Like Slinky's death has become a lens through with we suddenly see our lives. (That's how I'm feeling at the moment, anyway.) It continues to color how I see my world, and it's dismal and leeched of joy, though I go through the motions of everyday activities. I've been shaken and at the same time, I'm not rushing myself to Get Over this. My grief has its own timetable.
And the truth about trauma is that we are destined to experience it over and over again - that's what makes it traumatic. I think - I've been told - that it's supposed to get easier or less powerful as we are retraumatized. I can't see it in the moment, not at all.
Hang on, Tabitha. You can ride this one out, and come through the other side. (Do you have a therapist to talk to?)
ClearSkies
poster:ClearSkies
thread:835014
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080601/msgs/835030.html