Posted by TexasChic on February 1, 2006, at 17:35:23
In reply to Re: Things went well today. » TexasChic, posted by LegWarmers on February 1, 2006, at 0:27:07
I've been keeping up my positive attitude and pretending I don't notice the way certain people are treating me. But today one of the girls who is part of the cold-shoulder-girl's entourage came up to me and asked me if I wanted her lunch. I said, no thanks, I have a Hotpocket. The guy beside me said he'd take it. I asked her if she had something else to eat. She said, "Oh, um well, yeah". Later I saw the entourage clocking back in from going out to lunch together (again).
Now you can't tell me she could offer me her lunch and not have it occur to her that I might want to go with them when I have numerous times in the past. Its intentional!
Last summer I dealt with this same girl and another who are now the entourage, with an almost identical situation. But it was just them ignoring me. When they started being nice again I figured I would just let bygones be bygones. But I let myself get lured in again.
I just don't get it. Its so childish. Its like they have a meeting and decide, okay, so-and-so isn't responding anymore, who's next on our list to ignore? All of them have a history of doing this, I just assumed those situations were justified. Now I wonder.
It drives me crazy that I let it get to me, but I just can't help it. I sincerely thought of these people as my friends, and out of the blue they don't like me anymore and I have no idea why.
My first instinct is to give them the cold shoulder right back and make sure they know that I know what's going on. But that behavior always gets me more upset and depressed. So do I just not go out of my way to talk to them and then act fake when I run into them? That's basically what they're doing to me. But its so hard for me to not express my true feelings and be fake. But I guess that's what I'll try to do.
What makes it worse is cold-shoulder-girl is very good friends with the three guys I hang out with at work, two of which are the ones who apparently 'discussed' my having anxiety problems after I confided in one of them. Cold-shoulder-girl was the one who told me "You may not want to do the workshops this summer because they're really hard and stressful, and 'they' said you have anxiety problems." So in a way, I don't really want to hang out with them either. But I don't want to just avoid everyone! And I like these guys. Now I can't help but wonder if I'm wrong about them too and they don't really like me but just put up with me.
I KNOW if I had friends outside of work this wouldn't bother me as bad. Of course that's easier said than done.
What also sucks is my birthday is coming up and we had all planned to go out together. I could see them 'accidently' forgetting, or they might just go and keep acting fake to me like they do when I try to talk to them. I just don't know if I can go through all that faking. Why do people have to be so freaking weird?!?!
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On a POSITIVE note, my friend and his wife that moved to San Fransico are coming for a visit this weekend. He used to work with me, so I tell him about all the drama that goes on. He told me cold-shoulder-girl was a loser and I should just steer clear of her.
I'm excited to see them, I guess 'they're' my friends outside of work. Unfortunately they live too far away to hang out with very often.
-T
poster:TexasChic
thread:598840
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060124/msgs/605259.html