Posted by Tamar on December 27, 2005, at 20:49:09
In reply to Re: bah humbug » alexandra_k, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2005, at 15:56:25
(((((Alex)))))
I think I’m a bit older than you. And the lesson I’m learning now is: life is short. Too short to do *anything* out of obligation. I know it’s not so easy when you’re still somewhat dependent on your family. But maybe you can suck it up a bit more easily if you promise yourself that as soon as you are independent you can decide never to see them again at Christmas.
I get on very well with my family and nevertheless Christmas is stressful. This year I decided that because of my depression I wasn’t going to go anywhere or invite anyone. I spent the whole day in my pyjamas. So did my kids. I don’t know why my husband got dressed… I cooked a turkey (still in my pyjamas) and it was delicious. Every room is littered with wrapping paper and toys. I don’t give a damn. (Part of that is because of my mother-in-law’s accident, but still…)
I can’t begin to describe the sense of freedom I felt in doing Christmas without obligations. I highly recommend it. You might not manage it next year or the year after… But maybe the year after that? Just two or three more Christmases to get through and then you’re free.
You are doing everything right to live your life on your own terms. Education will get you where you want to go. You are clearly a bright and interesting woman and you have a great deal to offer. You can leave the crap behind you. Keep your eyes on the prize!
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:592374
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20051225/msgs/592603.html